Dortin Family Series

In 2016-2017 we were pushing for technology in schools. Technology for every assignment by typing was hard to accept. It was really hard for us to come to terms with the future of technology in education. But it came so hard upon us, and we were left without a choice. Yes, with the pandemic, everyone went indoors and embraced the online platform. All the infants went online. So, the detested Google classroom that was difficult for everybody became the order of the day. Then every company became creative. They overtook Skype, blackboard, and Moodle. Zoom, Teams, and Google Meet soared. Schoology was acquired by schools. They all emerged and overwhelmed us.

The issue of affordability surfaced. Technology companies, Microsoft, Google, along with Internet providers began to provide support and grants to the have-nots. Equity became a topic of discussion. How do we provide a level playing ground for our children attending schools from their different homes? Some parents cannot afford the computers and if they do, there’s no Internet schools that received numerous grants for mobile Internet, all classrooms, laptops, Chromebook, phones, and iPads, were empowered for service. That was just the beginning of the insanity.

Today the COVID-19 babies are growing. They were born during the pandemic and many parents that were stuck at home for two years did nothing but provide tablets and phones to babysit them. They are a new breed of people. Children who are not talking can browse the computer and play games. They can access whatever they want on their tablets and refuse to follow human direction but would do what Alexa or Siri says.

It is 2023/2024, the Covid babies are entering full day preschool. We have early childhood learning centers and universal pre-K. They are not in kindergarten yet. This is preschool and the majority of new students arrive as digital citizens. That is wonderful but you know what?

As I am returning from work I’m just working down to my packing space and here you go. The kids are coming back looking down. Everybody’s posture is face-on-your-phone. Everybody is in a different world while walking down the street. I am the only one looking up and watching the world go by.

Yes! mothers, grandmothers, youth, children are caught up in the craze. We all have the excuse to be glued on the internet all day long. It’s almost impossible to control the wrong use of tech these days. Most of the children know so much but cannot say their names. Or possibly do not care to talk to anyone. They are in a world of their own and do not need your questions or smiles.

The neuro diversities that are being discovered by the doctors are also a cause of concern and need further research. It is difficult to fathom. I don’t know if there is a relationship between autism and technology. I’m just thinking out loud, it’s time to begin to question the long-term effect of technology and the internet on young brains. It appears we cannot fully comprehend that until the young have grown. This is a call to question some of our practices in order to protect our most valuable possessions. Let us begin to review the implications of the effects of the Internet and dependence on technology on the development of the child.

For more information about keeping our children safe online, read the UNICEF article on the following link: Protecting children online | UNICEF

When one man cooks for the people, they finish the food. But let the people cook for one man and he is consumed by the food.
Yes! One man will never be greater than we, the people.

That is where we are. One man is using the most imprudent ones in society to upset the progress of the majority of the people. Is it possible? Try as he may, he has sold his joy for money and his integrity for a morsel of bread.

All I can think of now is Nigeria. I see the videos, audio, and photos of vagabonds being used as rags that will soon be discarded. I see someone who was said to be a professor being arrested because some illiterate has used her as a tool for election falsification. I see rogues being flogged openly on the streets because they were made tools to disorganize the elections.

I see the worst Independent National Electoral Commission administration wasting our time on protocols, addressing the observers, and clapping for themselves, while in their little minds, they owlishly believe they have fooled everyone.
How myopic! I thought we had a president who said he wanted to leave a legacy of a free and fair election. But NAY! I saw dissidents burning the nation as they destroyed ballot papers.

I saw mediocre insulting the electorates and boldly suppressing them at the polling booths. I thought there was the promise of electronic balloting, yet I saw paper, pen, and correction fluid used by digital illiterates who did not qualify to be electoral officers. I saw a youth corps member who confessed to tampering with polling results. And others being whipped and beaten for not joining in the fraud.

What didn’t my eyes see as I kept awake on election night? I saw children, in fact, toddlers voting and flaunting their voter’s cards on camera. While a police officer was quick to diagnose them with some form of growth defect. Yet they did not list them as individuals with disabilities.

Yes, I saw a nation’s show of shame. I saw all because, in these days of technology, you see everything. I saw policemen stealing ballot boxes and spreading the sacred mandates of our people on the streets as they were paid to ensure that certain people did not vote.

I saw a sister beaten, battered, and bandaged and she got up and resiliently returned and voted for change. Our people do not give up. That gives me HOPE.
Right at this corner, I saw enthusiastic Nigerians guard their votes as a mother protects her infant child. They waited amidst adversities to ensure that their votes were counted.

I heard the tumultuous applause of a united community of people who were sure that the movement has yielded the expected result. There were shouts of victory from coast to coast.

I heard the announcement that changed the mood, “results are not authentic unless announced by INEC,” those who promised us a free and fair election. Just as the skeptics did predict, there were technical hitches. That’s what they said.

It is a democracy. No one believes them anymore. In spite of their announcements, I saw citizens doing the right thing; taking photos of unit results and posting them on every portal. I saw concerned youth saving the hurt and protecting their neighbors.

I saw youth; Hausa, Igbo, Yoruba, Edo, Nupe, Tiv, and so on, banding together to achieve the same goal. My love for our native land was renewed when I saw young men and women under the rain, still waiting for the electoral officers to start for the day.

It was like a resurgence of the Nigeria of my youth, where hope was instilled and we worked together to be our sisters’ keepers. I saw a Nigeria that I have not seen in twenty-five years. One with the strength of brotherhood as the adage would say, “Igwe bu ike. There is strength in numbers.”

What I saw and still see gives me hope. I saw protesters peacefully banding together to resist the stealers of their mandate and seize the capitol no matter the cost. They were full of vigor. I saw another End SARS looming. The Revolution that will showcase the real Nigeria.

I saw the most respectful and loyal youth anywhere in the world. For when the worst was feared, I saw them recede like a torrent, as soon as their principal called for a peaceful approach. So, let the legal process begin. The sooner the better because youth cannot wait.

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I saw them apply reason and teach the thieves the one lesson they will take to their graves. You may be old but age is not a prerequisite for wisdom. God is. They listened and will not give room for tyrants to attack our hard-earned struggle.

I saw our youth return to their place in the cloud and leave the rubble for those who rob. I respect today’s youth for this peace and calm. They are reshaping our history. I applaud the leadership of the movement for the hope they exude. This tranquility alone tells us that together, you are able to lead Nigeria out of the present mess.

Indeed, a new Nigeria is possible!

-By Ngozi Martin-Oguike

3/3/23

So, we finally closed for the year. When I left office yesterday, I couldn’t fathom my feeling. I had a strange sense of relief and sudden awareness that it is Christmas! Everywhere was alight with urgency as people scampered helter-skelter for last minute preparations for Christmas. When I got into my car, I thought of my family and our community. What are we preparing for? I thought. Is this another season of eating and drinking and being merry? Is the season just for travels and gifts? Why the noise?
I remember in 1989, while I was entering the center of Benin City on Christmas Eve, you could never beat the chaos at Ring Road motor park. I still cringe when I think of being in a motor park in any Nigerian city on a day like that. I can still hear the hooting and the yelling and the cursing that shattered the peace and essence of Christmas. A bus conductor could not control his frustration as he tried to call passengers into his bus amidst other competitors. He yelled out, “See as everywhere de hala, say Igbo man de do Christmas.” (Look how everywhere is in confusion because the Igbo people are celebrating Christmas).
As a person of Igbo decent, that resonated with me. It was so comical because it was true. Igbos are essentially traders and this is the time to leave the cities for a time of celebration at home. Home was known as “East”. Every other place was referred to as, “Abroad.” Typical, Igbo people, known as Ndi Igbo, MUST return home for Christmas. Christmas is not Christmas to them except it is celebrated in the village, among kith and kin. This has become a tradition spanning from the 1970s.
Hmmm! I stood to consider the meaning of that statement, everywhere is in disarray because a group of people are celebrating Christmas. Over the years, I’ve come to learn that Christmas is a big deal in most parts of the world. Not just among Ndi Igbo. And I have also learned that it becomes overwhelming due to the over-commercialization we experience in our capitalistic economy. Is that what you want your Christmas to be?
Many of us allow competition to enslave us. People want to appear to be enjoying life when they are actually enduring, striving, and trying to belong. That’s why Christmas becomes a time for marketers to distract us from the purpose and meaning of Christmas. What should really be our preoccupation during this last week of the year? Yes, families coming together. And doing what?
As we read today’s passage on the genealogy of Jesus, Matthew 1: 1 – 17 and reflected on the inclusion of 5 women as part of the lineage of Jesus Christ: Tamar, Hagar, Ruth, Bathsheba and Mary, it was clear that apart from Mary, the virgin, all the others were either from enemy nations or women of questionable character. The Lord met them where they were and made them instruments in His hands. None of these women, even Mary was good enough. It was the grace of God that got them into history. So, what are you pursuing this Christmas? Money, fun, fame or the Savior of mankind?
The message of Jesus’ genealogy teaches us that Christ came for all people. None of us earned our salvation. Therefore, we have been called to “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.” Mark16:15.
Where next are you going with the gospel?
This is wishing you all Merry Christmas and a Prosperous 2023.

Sister Ngozi

Women! Women!! Women!!! The weaker vessel, the poverty-stricken, the most distressed, the talk of the town! Yet in the most precarious situations you discover their resilience and unity of purpose. That’s why she is called Woman! Mother! I felt that way talking to Hanatu at the Internally Displaced People’s (IDP) Camp in Abuja last Summer.

Hanatu is the women’s leader at the camp. She is a mother, a volunteer, a leader and a teacher, making strides together with other ladies in a community that seems forgotten. Amidst hardship, she trusts in God and continues to encourage others, men, women, youth and families, in spite of all odds.

Together, these women formed a cooperative society geared towards providing money for their members to enable them trade, farm or open workshops in and out of the camp. They are called, “Women Togetherness Association.” Yes, together, they can conquer.

As a nonprofit, tax exempt organization, COFY incorporated implores you to donate to these women’s fund to enable them survive and provide for their families living in the IDP camp at New Kuchingoro, Abuja, Nigeria.

Your donation will empower these women at this time of need. Don’t forget, “for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in,” Matthew 25:35.

May God bless you as you support this project with any amount.  Please donate here.

We are in a brand-new year, 2022. A new year is a promise of new beginnings, a time to reboot and refocus. While we all look forward to new frontiers to cross, I bring you updates from our December outreach.

On December 15, 2021, “Team Uche” was at New Kuchingoro IDP camp in Abuja to serve our folks there with food and water. It was a tumultuous event as the cry of hunger and poverty rang through the camp. Yes! There is hunger in the land. The gap between the poor and the rich could not be more obvious. The plea in the voices of the children continue to haunt us, even weeks after. They want to be fed. They fought to get more food. The stampede was uncontrollable. However, the gratitude from the community was gratifying. We appreciate the leaders and teachers at the camp.  We pray that your deliverance will come sooner than later.

Indeed, there are no rich people in Nigeria. How could anyone be rich in a country where millions of children wake up and sleep in hunger, and families live in abject poverty with no where to call for help. Indeed, there is not a wealthy man in a community where illness, lack and deprivation are yet to be addressed. If there are any leaders, then they must never know rest, as long as these ills persist. Until the internally displaced people are relocated and equipped to function like citizens and not refugees, Nigeria is a nation at war against herself.

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Thanks to all those who are joining to answer the call to serve. Thank you, Uchenna and your team. Who else wants to go?  If you are moved to help, please, reach out to us and be a vessel of honor. Respond on this blog and we will contact you.

Our watchword remains, “I was hungry and you gave me meat: I was thirsty, and you gave me drink: I was a stranger, and you took me in:” Matthew 25:35.

Happy and blessed New Year to you All!

Photo Credits:

Zuma Rock by Ngozi Martin-Oguike, August 2021

Feeding at New Kuchingoro by Uchenna Oguike, December 2021

I returned from my recent mission trip to Abuja, Nigeria humbled and subdued. It was both exhilarating and sobering as I embarked on a journey that was not planned by me. On an adventure that was not recommended by man. It was a clear experience of God working out his purpose one day at a time. In the course of planning, only one thing was clear, God was leading me to go to Nigeria to teach teachers.

So, I went. Thanks to the support of my husband and St. John’s women. As well as the prayers of the saints.  I can’t thank you all enough. I went to collaborate with the Cafrillasia Educational Foundation, Jos and Association of Christian Schools of Nigeria. These groups provided the audience and did the local organizing in readiness for the event.

The outreach was thrilling, and the outcry of the educators was, “Do it again and again!” I had the best audience ever. I got reintegrated into the culture and we started the much-needed conversation about how education will help our society in these times of peril. The participating educators and school leaders were passionate men and women of great faith. Their verbal and written responses show that they have imbibed the growth mindset and are committed to implementation of their learning in their different realms of influence. Indeed, we started to develop lifelong learners who are ready to think critically.

Nonetheless, the most strategic feature of the mission was our visit to the Internally Displaced People’s (IDP) camp, New Kuchingoro in the heart of Abuja, Nigeria’s Federal Capital Territory. It is unbelievable that a short stone throw from the center of affluence in Abuja, lies a shanty town of displaced people, refugees who are “fellow Nigerians.” It was three days after my arrival as we drove around the city, Uchenna pointed towards the camp, “Auntie, there is an IDP camp.” I was startled. I’ve heard of IDP camps but never seen one. “Please, could you take me there now?” I pleaded. It was completely outside of my planned mission. Instantly, it became the first event on my program.

We drove into the deplorable community to see for myself. On that first visit, we spoke with some leaders of the community and got an insight into how they live. I cannot describe the level of poverty and deprivation that stared me in the eye. Talk of subhuman conditions for no choice of theirs.

The residents were people of all works of life, mostly Christians and a few Muslims whose homes have been destroyed and their communities overtaken by the religious extremist insurgence in Borno State. They became refugees and relocated, having lost everything, including many of their family members to the murderous hands of those miscreants. These Nigerian citizens traveled over 400 miles to settle in the heart of Abuja. They live less than ten miles from the presidential lodge, Aso Rock. Yet they are unnoticed by the so-called government.

In New Kuchingoro, the IDPs live in makeshift batchers, built with worn out corrugated iron sheets. Some non-governmental organizations have provided them a school house for their teeming population of children and a medical center in a trailer. Yet, to say the least, they live below human standards. It bled my heart that they do not have basic necessities, such as water, food and of course shelter. In the past month, nine of the children died of cholera. Why not? Any communicable disease would thrive in a place where children are malnourished and hygiene rules cannot hold. The camp is a picture of Nigeria, the new poverty capital of the world.

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I noticed that some NGOs and churches are helping. Members of the community are well-dressed but not well-nourished. We visited again on the next Sunday. We had food for one hundred people. The kids lined up; hunger was palpable. We prayed and started to distribute food. When we ran out, I was in tears. We should have prayed for the miracle of the feeding of 5,000. But too late.

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We invited three of their teachers to attend the educational mission and get some support for their school but it was not enough. We need to save lives. I want to return there again and again. I want to help one child at a time. Can you go with me? We want to send them food, can you contribute? We want to save some, perhaps a genius, a leader of tomorrow, a pastor, a missionary. Will you be part of this outreach?

The Lord will say on that day,

35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, [a] you did it to me.’

Matthew 25: 35 – 40

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The room is crowded

Flowers are so colorful

That I wink to behold them

The sun is brighter than many flashlights on my eyes.

I can’t sit here and listen

To your boring show

When I have a call within me

Listening to the song tingling my ears.

Within my mind I remember;

The past, the present and the future.

I tell my story and amuse myself

As I am made to do.

Ngozi 4/2/21

April 1

I read and I Lead

I cannot express it the way you want,

Don’t you understand?

I don’t want to cry,

so I won’t try.

What words are these?

You call them ease or geese?

My eyes are blurred,

My speech is slurred.

They avoid my jingles

They laugh, they giggle

As I struggle to piece the syllables

Into words so visible.

I am alone,

Standing on my own

Let me listen and learn

And claim my place in the clan.

I cannot speak whatsoever the vein

I create my own plain

I do not read, I lead the way

My desire controls my day.

I envision

I triumph

I hold on to the ladder

Of my pecking order.

I climb to the pinnacle,

Where I receive the support

That gave me the power of comfort.

Now I read, now I lead!

• Ngozi Martin-Oguike

4/1/21

Nneka, who was formerly married to Okedi, told me that during their pre-marriage counseling, the pastor had asked her fiancé if he loved her and he said he did not. The pastor told her what he said and asked her to make a last minute decision. She was bitter, but decided to go ahead and wed him. What was her intention for marrying someone who clearly did not love her? Did she make the right decision? Or did she think things would change? That marriage started on a loveless footing and did not endure the stress test at all.

…for better for worse, for richer for poorer; in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish…

You must be madly in love to be able to withstand the battle that lies ahead.

When the going moves from better to worse, richer to poorer and good health begins to dwindle, how steadfast will you be? It is a beautiful sight to see a couple after 50 years of marriage, still holding hands, making jokes and teasing each another as they walk along on their God-chosen path. When we see young couples who soon become cantankerous to each other, we wonder if they chose to follow the few negative examples around them. I just think the majority of marriages follow the pledge, “for better, for worse.” I have seen far too many couples living together successfully that I will subscribe to marriage any time. It is the best place to be. However, coming into it with wrong intentions always yield wrong results. For, as you make your bed, so you will lie on it.

Funny enough, some marriages become illegal before they are contracted. What does that mean? Before the exchange of vows, the minister will ask:

If either of you know any impediment, why you may not be lawfully joined together in matrimony, ye do now confess it. For be ye well assured that so many as are coupled together otherwise than God’s word doth allow are not joined together by God; neither is their matrimony lawful.

I’ve read this declaration over and over again and I saw why Christian marriage is different. It’s not the same as the fair weather relationship that Naka has been in for ten years. It’s a well-thought out, God-founded institution of its own, which is established after the searching of hearts and intentions. It is a one-man, one-woman relationship that only ends at the death of one or both of them. Is that your understanding of Christian marriage? If so, are you carefully tending and nurturing your relationship? If not, then you may be in something other than Christian marriage. It doesn’t depend on the venue of the ceremony. It could be done on your porch, a park, a church or a waterfront. Yes, anywhere before the presence of God! Marriage is a spiritual covenant.

In the course of marriage preparation and counseling, the bride and groom are taught the meaning and implications of marriage, which parents should have taught them by exemplary living. They will now do background checks to rule out incestuous relationship and any other biological impediments. At the point of wedding, truth must have been told. Prior to approaching the altar, each must confess to the other regarding their past life. Serious and unserious past relationships must have been discussed and, if there were children before marriage, the circumstances must be known to both spouses. Why then will the minister still be asking for confessions on the day of solemnization of holy matrimony?

It is important to keep asking and to clear all doubts until the deed is done. It is also of much importance to ask publicly for general records, so the pastor will never be accused of wedding anyone illegally. Anglican and key protestant traditions have publications of banns of marriage. The public is informed of intending marriages so they can report any known obstacle. The banns are read on three consecutive Sundays before the wedding ceremony. Nevertheless, the question is still asked at the wedding event. Of course, some intended marriages have been discontinued at the point of wedding. Brides and grooms have changed their minds or someone had come up with accusations that led to the end of a wedding, up till the last hour.

I think the church fathers had divine wisdom because even in this 21^st century, I have heard of a married man who got engaged to a lady in another country, pretending never to have been married. He made the woman, who was desperate to get married, to spend her money for a society wedding, officiated by high church clerics and celebrated with pomp and pageantry. After that, she started to process immigration papers for him to join her.

The wedding ended, and everyone else returned home; papers were now being processed. Unfortunately for him, the cat was let out of the bag. His new wife had a visit from his village. Things fell apart when the visitor divulged the secret of his double marriage. As his dishonesty was revealed, the angry new wife pulled the plug to all immigration plans. He had the dubious intention of leaving the poor lady immediately after he obtained his position in the newfound country. Tales are unending about how people deceive others into marriage with the intention of conning them. Both men and women have been victims of such unlawful relationships.

A Christian’s intention ought to be pure. Marriage requires self-searching and openness. If you have a plan B before your marriage, you also need to confess it to/ discuss it with your spouse. If you want God to uphold your new home, then you have to be in a legal marriage. You must not be a gold digger whose only intent is gain. If you are keeping secrets that, when revealed, will destroy your marriage, you are not ready for marriage. Your marriage is illegal even before it is contracted.

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